If you meet me today, you won’t believe that I was bullied at school and I couldn’t understand it at that point of time because I thought it’s normal to be not part of the crowd and be all by yourself. The only friend that I managed to have was my elder brother, even if I used to lose my eraser, I used to run up to him and he would happily arrange one for me, all in all, I had and have a friend who is actually a messenger of god because introverts are always blessed by god, a little more.
As a kid, I remember that girls used to make girlfriends they used to fight over petty issues and cry because their girlfriends left them and this thing was something I couldn’t ever digest. Instead, I used to eat my food in one corner of the school, watch people playing basketball and used to write my own dairy, draw various things and doodle a lot.
When I grew up a bit, like in my sixth standard the girls who were hit by puberty early had grown up into beautiful young women while I was still a short statured girl who had no idea of when she is going to be as beautiful as her classmates were then. Because they were showered with great and personified beauty, they made good use of it by dating boys not men. At those times, I was busy making sure that I was a good hockey player and at studies. I was isolated because I wasn’t a grown up because puberty had hit me late. Secondly, in my head all these things seemed to be foolish making a girlfriend/boyfriend and then crying for losing them over petty issues like the boyfriend gave his eraser to the other girl while I had my stationary all backed up with my brother, I never needed a boyfriend/girlfriend.
Because in my opinion, the thinking and everything else of the entire class was different, I was never able to make friends but it helped me as I became independent and self dependent. Whenever I had to make my school projects, we were asked to form teams, I would rather walk to my subject teacher and tell her that I don’t have any friend and would make one all alone. In the beginning, she would be astonished but with passage of time, every teacher knew that I would submit an isolated project. I remember making my social sciences project which was a research of 100 pages hand written and well explained. Though, I was backed by my father in all such projects but I became a good researcher. A person who knew what she was writing in her project, I would write and explain them to my teacher. Maybe, that’s the reason I was able to become a lawyer.
Now, how was I bullied? I never used to talk to anyone therefore, I had no bench partner and that’s the worst thing ever as a kid- not having a partner to sit with therefore, I always wanted to miss school and stay back because I had ample partners to sit with at my place. There were people who would make fun of me because while most of the girls were beautiful, I was tanned, thin and had hair which were more or less like Hagrid but I didn’t give a damn about anyone, I neither hated them nor loved them but, I lived my own life. My childhood, as I remember it now consisted of playing hockey, colouring everything, drawing pictures and playing with my elder brother. The only friend I had at a school who stayed with me for years together was my dairy.
Another major reason for being bullied was that I was unaware of the word “sex” and I am proud of it. Kids in my class used to talk about it and I used to be busy in my own dreamy world not concerned about who wasdating whom and who had kissed the other while we all were busy solving mathematical equations. Yes, I had names which I don’t know but let me tell you whatever I am today, it leaves them in sheer amazement.
I am about to be 25 years old and let me share with you. I am thankful that I was bullied or rather I had no friends at that point of time because I made good use of it by playing my game, studying what I loved and drawing what I wanted to. At the age of 11, I wasn’t concerned that I had to date someone or if in the lunch break I had to find a place to kiss my boyfriend. My lunch time concern was only this that I need to reach the canteen at the earliest before the burgers get over or before it’s too overcrowded to buy one. If you are ever bullied remember the ones who laugh are part of the crowd but you are different because there is something different in your inner soul which is not acceptable to others.
Today, 21 years down the lane, I have no regrets that I was bullied, you know why? Because most of them are friends with me on facebook and they are not better off than me. They couldn’t even make it to a good graduation school nor could they achieve something better. They all were part of the crowd then and now. Also, the girls who then were very beautiful have lost their beauty it to the pain that they had to take early in their life in the form of breaking up, patching up and what not. The guys who used to think that I am not beautiful have sent me proposals and I have rejected them, flat on because I don’t think they have a thinking which can match mine.
“So, if you are friendless right now, at whatever age. Make sure you read whatever you get hold of, draw whatever you can make, colour wherever you can fill and live the way you want to but never change for the ones who laugh because they are part of the crowd while you are the one who stands out of the crowd.”